The element of surprise...

I remember one Christmas, not long after I was married, where I thought I had the perfect gift for my new husband. We were watching TV one evening and a commercial came on for an electric screwdriver with a flashlight built it. I remember Jeff saying, well that's a good idea! So, I mentally stored and saved that information in my brain. It was a few months before Christmas when we saw that commercial, so I was thinking what a surprise it would be and how sweet he would think I was for remembering. Well, in the "sweetest" mood I could muster up I went to Sears to find the said screwdriver. I found it! It was a craftsman to boot! Now I'm thinking, well I know he loves Craftsman tools, so this is just an added bonus! I purchased the screwdriver, wrapped it and put it under the tree. I was so excited for him to open it, that when Christmas came I gave that gift to him first. He opened it....me smiling the biggest smile ever, and he looked at it and said...whats this? I, still smiling, said...its the screwdriver with flashlight that you said you liked!! Really? was his response...when did I say that? One evening when we were watching TV!! I remembered!! I'm still smiling waiting for the praise that I was sure I deserved. Then he puts on the fakest smile he could muster up and said...well thank you honey! That's it...that's all I get for remembering a tool you said you loved and going out and finding it??? Thank-you honey?? I said...is it not the right one? He's searching his memory trying to remember the commercial I keep referring to and said...no, its great! I do remember him fidgeting with it for about a minute or two and then tossing it aside. It was a few months later that I was helping him with some kind of home improvement and he asked me to go get a screwdriver. I ran to the garage and saw that wonderful screwdriver on his workbench...I think it was still in the package...and that's the one I brought to him. He looked at it and said...oh, not that one....I save that one for "special" projects! OK..the gig is up! You don't like it!! I remember saying and he said...I just don't remember ever saying I wanted it. I said..Jeff, we were watching TV and a commercial came on for it and you said...oh, that's a great idea. THAT was my first lesson in sarcasm. You were being sarcastic?? You really didn't think it was a great idea!! He was like...honey, a screwdriver with a flashlight on it?? Really?? That was the last Christmas I tried to surprise him with a gift. As a matter of fact, from then on any time he mentioned that he liked something...sarcastic or not...I deliberately didn't buy it for him. I believe he has personally hand picked his gifts ever since. So much for the element of surprise!

Ghostly encounters

I've always been intrigued with ghosts. As far as I know, everyone in the family has a ghost story or two...but I find my "man" story the best. So here it is.
Tyler was no more than 4 when this happened. It all started with clowns. I had decorated the boys room with clowns. Me and a friend of mine worked very hard in there painting and stencilling clowns all over the room. One day at the table, we were eating breakfast, Tyler insisted that I tell the clown to leave. I said..Tyler I can't tell the clowns to leave, but I can paint over them if you like. He said...no, that clown (as he pointed to the corner of the room)! I said..there is a clown in the corner? He said...yes, and I don't like him! I was a little taken aback by that, but the day continued as usual. One or two days after that, I was sitting in my chair and Tyler was coloring at the coffee table. He looked down the hall (from my position I couldn't see down the hall) and said...who's that man? I said..What man? The man down the hall, was his response. I jumped up and ran to his position and looked down the hall. I didn't see a man and told him so. He said...he's right there! So, I took his hand and asked him to show me. We walked down the hall and when we were about at the end Tyler said...oh, he went down the hole! I said...what hole?? He then pointed to a spot on the carpet next to my room. I was more than a little taken aback, I was terrified! Everyday after that Tyler would run around playing and laughing and I would ask him....what are you doing? He would always respond...playing with the man. I use to watch a little girl next door a couple days a week, and when she came over she played with the man as well. She was younger than Tyler, so couldn't talk as well but she would run around and laugh and play just like Tyler would. One day she was to lay down and take a nap on the couch and I was watching her. She would pop her head up as if someone called her name and she would look down the hall and laugh and wave. At times she would get up and start slowly walking to the end of the hall as if someone was coaxing her and I would always stop her and tell her to lay down. I wasn't really afraid of the man until one night in my bed I felt as if my body was rising off the bed. I remember getting out and going to the small bathroom in my room and saying. Leave me alone...you don't scare me! After that he never really bothered me, but would mess with some of my friends. My friends didn't come over much. Anyway, after this went on for a while I asked a really good friend of mine what I should do. She suggested the next time Tyler is playing with him to ask him who he is and why he is there. So, low and behold the very next day Tyler is in his room playing and running around and I go in there and ask him what he's doing. Again the response...playing with the man. I asked Tyler where he was and he said under his bed. I asked Tyler to ask the man why he was here. Tyler got on his knees and looked under his bed and asked the man the question. Tyler looked up at me and said...he was shot! I said...he was shot? Where was he shot? Tyler again looked under the bed and asked him and then looked up at me and said...in September! Now, I knew September was a word that Tyler hadn't ever said before or possibly even knew, so when he said that I grabbed him and the little girl and ran out and closed the door behind me. I knew right then and there that the man is real! Tyler was in my room the next day, I kind of kept him out of his room as much as possible, and was watching TV. All of a sudden he started screaming....the man, the man, he's on tv!! I ran to my room and looked at the tv, the cartoon he was watching had a man dressed in black wearing a hat and holding a cane. Tyler told me that was the man! Okay, now I know what he looks like now how do I get rid of him?? Well, needless to say, I didn't get rid of him and we ended up moving shortly after that. Occasionally, we would drive by our old house just to look at it. Every time we did, Tyler would say...that's where the man lives!

Is it crazy?

Is it crazy that I take Advil every night to prevent a headache? I don't have a headache at the time...but hey, I may get one! Is it crazy that I check the oven and the stove before going to bed, not just once but several times? I mean, what if someone walked by and switched it all on after I made sure it was off?? Is it crazy that I lock and unlock and relock the door several times, and then check it again later just to be sure? Is it crazy that I have to make sure the iron is off before going to bed...even though I know no one has used the iron in probably weeks? I don't just look to see if its unplugged, I have to touch it to be sure! Is it crazy that I never open my windows, but I check them every night to make sure they're locked? Is it crazy that I have to do a spider check every night before getting into bed? Most of all, is it crazy that I've reread this post a half dozen times and am now thinking of deleting it?? Am I crazy, or am I overprotective? Am I crazy, or am I thorough? Am I crazy, or am I OCD?....which ,by the way, I believe is code for "one crazy dame"!!

Make it stop!

For the past 9 mths or so I've been living with a horrible ringing in my ear. I've been to several doctors, had a hearing test, but no one could determine what is causing the ringing. After I'd suffered with this a while I learned that my sister was having the same problem. Though I wouldn't wish this ailment on my worse enemy...I was somewhat relieved to find out that she had it too. After a lot of investigating...on her part...I think we finally blamed it on age and pretty much stopped complaining. Every so often though, while talking on the phone, she may say "how's your ringing". My response is always, "its there" and she will say "so is mine". Recently she had her annual visit with her Doctor and mentioned the said ringing to get her thoughts. She called me afterwards and asked if I took a lot of Advil. Well as a matter of fact I do! So...she suggested, per her doctor, that I stop taking it for a couple of weeks and see if it stops. I decided to comply and stopped taking the Advil about 3 days ago. As I sit here and write this, the ringing is so loud I can hardly hear myself think. So...do I continue with this so called remedy and give it more time? Or, do I get back on the Advil wagon to prevent a potential headache? Hard to decide now with Carole of the Bells playing constantly in my ear. I don't know why I'm writing this..I imagine its to prevent me from throwing myself off the nearest bridge. Its driving me crazy!!! MAKE IT STOP!!!

I never thought much about being a Grandma, because I thought it would happen much later in my life. Not that 50 is too young to be a Grandma, in my mind when I think of "Grandma"....I think of a Grandma Hughes type. But, now that I am one I can't imagine ever not being one. Its the greatest feeling in the world. Totally different from when you have your own kids. I don't have to worry if he has had too many cookies, or if cereal and chocolate milk is bad to give for dinner. This is "Nona's" house...have a ball! No bedtime...no rules....no punishment....just fun! Then...hand them over to Daddy!! Besides just love being around the little rugrat...he is very funny to boot! I love 3...what an age! He just says what he thinks...anything and everything. How great would that be if we all could do that...just say what we think. A few examples come to mind....for instance, if I would like a hug or a kiss from Aiden, and he just isn't in the mood he will say.."no thank you". So..if your husband wants to come home for LUNCH, why can't we just say "no thank you"! Aiden has no problem saying "I'm outta here" when I'm doing something he has no interest in. So, why when I was trapped in the hospital room while my MIL was having her catheter didn't I just say "I'm outta here!"? If I make something that he doesn't like he has no problem pushing the plate away saying "I don't like it!" So, why do I eat it and pretend to like it? I would love to push the plate away and say I don't like it! "Whats that icky smell?" Another thing I could have said while sitting in a small room with a man who probably hadn't showered in weeks!! Aiden would have said it!! When someone is rambling on and on and you just want to say "stop talking"...why don't we? We have to grow up...we have to learn manners....we have to think about other people's feelings...we just have to be nice! Lets put one day aside and be 3 again. Just say what we think, anytime..anywhere. I bet its a lonely day...a lonely day indeed! In the mean time...I'm outta here!

Whole new meaning of Daughter-in-Law

How do I begin.....
Well, my mother in law had surgery on her shoulder yesterday. I volunteered to be at the hospital during the procedure...first mistake? Perhaps.
I got there at 9 in the morning and was heading to my car at 5:30 that evening.
Now waiting for someone to get out of surgery is hard enough, but not compared to what was in store for me. I love my MIL, don't get me wrong, but I just happen to think that favorite Daughter- in- law status has to have a stopping point somewhere. As she was being wheeled in after she awoke, she looked at me and said "you're still here?".....you mean I could have left?? I, of course, said "yes I'm still here". Then it all began! She wanted ice chips...no problem! She wanted more blankets...no problem! She wanted a barf bag...again, no problem. She wanted a catheter.....problem!! The nurse came in to perform the procedure when my FIL excused himself from the room....wait, what about me?? She is in the middle of telling me a story, so as not to be rude I listen while the nurse is getting ready. Well....the nurse is ready and she looks at me and says..do you want to leave? Thank God....YES! My MIL grabs my arm and says...no, she's okay..and continues with her story. I, keeping my eyes fixated on hers the whole time....smile and politely listen to 900 cc's of pee exit her body!! Well...the worst is over, right? Wrong! She finally gets discharged and I have to help her get dressed. This is the part where I have to tell you I had to put her underwear on and also got a boob shot! Now we can leave and I head to the car on the phone with her sister. She finds it inconvienent to leave her house at this hour and pick up meds for her one and only sister. So...guess who volunteered?? I go home and grab my husband....this is his mom for God's sake, he can go with me. We go get the 5...yes 5 perscriptions that this quack of a Doctor perscribed for her and head to her house. While sitting there she informs us that she has to pee. My husband quickly says "I can't help with that" and her ass of a husband makes no attempt to move, so again I volunteer. We make it to the bathroom and she turns and faces me...lifts her one good arm and says, will you pull them down? Ummm...sure! She then sits on the potty and attempts to pee. Well...the next thing I hear is "I have to self cath!' What?? Did I hear that right??? I said, right now? Yes..in that drawer grab the yellow jar. Now grab the catheter...now grab the vaseline. Oh dear God...this is going to happen!! I...yes me..have to prep this contraption. Next thing I know..legs are spred and she is performing a self cath. All I hear as I turn my head is, "oh, I missed the hole....oh, I missed it again....oh man, where's the hole??" The prayer now going through my head?? "please don't make me find the hole...please don't make me find the hole". Thank you lord, cause the next thing I hear is 900 cc's of pee exit her body!

New year has begun

Okay, I set this blog up days ago and think its about time I write something.

Here it is, a new year has begun
2009 gone and auld lang syne sung.
Like a new page...new chapter in life
Be a better Mother, perhaps a better wife.
Now the kids are older and they dwindle out the door
hearing the word mommy, probably never more.
Makes me think back at all the times past
hearing people say, "it goes by so fast".
I now know the truth and I hear myself say
to other new mommies.."it happens that way".
So, new chapter to me means so so much more
now that my children are walking out the door.